Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Call Me Sherpa Wyatt

Dear Blog Readers:

Since lots of people like to refer to themselves as Sherpa this and Sherpa that, I think from now on I want to be called Sherpa Wyatt. Or Sherpa Yoda maybe? Even though I've never been to the Himalayas and I'm not even a real Sherpa. But what does that matter? I mean, my blog gets 17 hits a second, so I'm, like, famous?!?!?!?!? I think I even have a world-wide following. Yeah, calling myself Sherpa Wyatt may seem totally ass clownish and douchey, but it's now who I am. I'm rebranded! And while I'm at it, here are other things I want to be called:
  • Philanthropist (I did, after all, donate $50 to Elevation Trail!)
  • Motivational speaker (Once I told a guy in a marathon to hang in there. That has to make me a motivational speaker, right? Right?)
  • Adventure guide (I once took a few friends on a tour of our trails here in Parker.)
  • And, last but not least, ENDURANCE ATHLETE! (Does that even need to be explained?)
  • (I can't yet call myself a documentary film-maker since I haven't figured out how to shoot good footage with my iPhone. But when I do figure that out, look out!)
Here's a photo to prove my street cred--er, mountain cred. Yeah, that's Pikes Peak in the background. I just stomped all over that little heap of nothing! It's even easier than Leadville!
 
Now, if you don't mind, I'm off to work on my other website, which was launched in 1995, and I'm proud to say it hasn't changed one iota since then! It's a great vehicle for carpet bombing crappy, corporate-owned races through the power of the keyboard. Also, I need to start a lawsuit against some jack-wagon who owes me $80. When you're as famous as I am, you're busy!

Call me old school! And Sherpa Wyatt, too!

18 comments:

  1. This made me smile, thanks. I love how you ended it.. as if there was any question.

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  2. Sherpa left New England in search of a fresh supply of bridges to burn. It would seem that he's succeeding.

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  3. God dammit, Wyatt, now I'm going to have to clean all this coffee off of my keyboard.

    This post is why we invented the internet. Glad to see you finally blogging the way it was meant to be done.

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  4. Waiting for the bullying accusation to fly next.

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  5. Waiting for the bullying accusations to fly.

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  6. haha... classic!
    here's a telling fact:
    google "sherpa john" and you will see that the first thing google autocomplete suggests is "sherpa john douche". hilarious. tells you everything you need to know.

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  7. Son of a bitch. I honestly don't care for many of your posts but this one was pretty damn brilliant.

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  8. Can you please put this in a YouTube video?

    I have a copy of iMovie with some kick ass templates you can borrow if you need. You know, to make it professional.

    Barechested Sherpa Basit

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  9. Where's the self-righteous indignation? I'm not sure you have what it takes to be a Sherpa.
    Missed ya at the Pancake run on Sat.

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  10. If the blog was irrelevant you wouldn't be writing about it. Getting personal is constructive though....

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  11. Oh my god! Wait, let me get my popcorn!

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  12. The first time I ran into another famous "Sherpa" on a run he was doing nothing but badmouthing other well known runners and an owner of popular running website to his friends and I didn't hear a positive thing out of his mouth. I ran a little faster so as to not have to listen to anymore bloated ego.

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  13. Man, this is so good. But you forgot to mention that you climbed the 100,000 highest "peaks" in New Hampshire, that you can vouch for what makes an ultra "old school" since you've been running them for 10 years, you didn't use the word "truly" enough, you didn't use the word "heartbeats" to mean people, you didn't use any photos of yourself in a "touchdown" pose, and you haven't created a logo with your image in it. Still, nice effort!

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  14. Wyatt, dude, this kind of commentary is beneath you. You have a lot of good things to share, and if you have a problem with a guy, you say it to his face. One of your criticisms is public trashing of other people, and its pretty hypocritical to then stoop to that yourself. You two do have some mutual friends - I'm happy to count myself as one of them. Lay off.

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  15. Hi Brad: All fair points. I didn't single anyone out in this particular blog post. I will say this: Criticism of Leadville is OK--this is a free country. For example, Elevation Trail has been critical of Leadvile but that criticism has been fair and thoughtful. But there comes a point when bomb throwing at the expense of a race many of us love (and a town, I would add) goes overboard and needs to be confronted.

    Wyatt

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